On The Right Track

This summer has been all about flexibility. And adaptability. This summer more than any other time in recent months I have seen my kids change their minds and attitudes about so many things that I've lost track. But I'll try to recount.

For my oldest, the new attitude has been about summer camps. Until just yesterday, I had completely forgotten that she really didn't enjoy summer camp last year. Good thing I have this handy blog to remember how many kids I have, because I think I might forget that too in a few years.

I went to sign up my daughter for a couple of camp days at a gym place with her brother and sister and the woman that runs the place very nicely reminded me of her failed attempt at one day of camp last summer. Only one day and she couldn't complete it. I had to pick her up early. Oops. Totally blacked that out of my memory. Then I return home from said gym and my mom tells me about how my daughter just finished telling her that she "hated" all her summer camps last year. Hmmm. Forgot about that too.

Then it all comes flooding back to me. The struggle to say good-bye. The need to send her off to camp with some transitional object of mine. Her desire to just stay home.

Alas, this year we have seen a change of heart. I signed her up for a choir camp (to which she said "choir!?!" with a roll of her eyes when I told her it was an option for this summer). It's actually just regular old singing, plus some percussion lessons. She needs both if she wishes to pursue her career as a professional musician and singer, which is her latest aspiration. And she's really enjoying it. She even wanted to go extra early this morning so she could have more time to spend with the kids at camp.

What a change. And when I approached the subject of a couple of camp days at that gym with her brother and sister she vowed to me that this year she'd really like it.

Enough said. She's back on track.

Perhaps I didn't need to volunteer my time, and enroll my younger two kids, at the girl scout camp for two weeks at the end of July. I did so a few months ago when I met resistance about her going to the camp. So, figuring that it would just be the latest in sacrificing my sanity in the name of hers, I threw my name in the hat as a volunteer counselor.

Perhaps I was a bit too hasty with that decision. But more on that later.

Now for my younger daughter, we are finally getting her on the track - for the first time - with summer camps. She's really come out of her shell lately and amazed me with her new found confidence. She completed a week of basketball camp and by the end of the week, she was ready to sign up for another week. With or without her friend, and with our without the same team coach. Look at her just going with the flow! Who knew?

She's also gone to the athletic club kid care place a couple of times this week and never once had an issue saying good-bye or breaking down. She took it all in stride, even if she said she wasn't happy about it. And in the end she even said it "wasn't so bad".

Chalk up another huge step for the shy girl.

Now for my son's summer update. He's been a huge freak for this little gym place. He always loved to go when I had to go in the gym with him, but he was actually much more shy than most people would expect of him, given his endless energy. At various times throughout the hour he would insist on being with me to participate, and if we were asked to just watch our kids, he would usually choose to not do the activity and just stay by my side. When the spring class ended and I signed him up for the class that was for his age and required him to participate by himself, I was a bit nervous about how he'd do.

The first day of class came and he couldn't wait to go. I kept telling him that he would have to do the class all by himself like his big sister, and for the most part he seemed okay with it. But I've seen this before with my younger daughter, and I got burned by thinking all would be well.

For the summer schedule he has to watch his sister's class first, and then it is time for his class. Perhaps it was that hour of anticipation that helped him along, but when the time came for his class, he ran right in and never looked back. He did (almost) everything that the teacher asked of him, and came running out, flushed in the cheeks and proud of his accomplishments.

Now we can check that one off the list too. Not only that, but after hitting a slight bump in the road with our good-byes at the club at the end of spring (even with the "pocket treat" at the ready), we are back on track with those drop-offs too. Runs right in and doesn't look back. With the pocket treats too, of course.

This summer is really marking a time of growth for us. At long last, after eight years of parenting, we are finally seeing some signs that our kids are ready to explore the world with open minds and willing attitudes.

And, at long last, after eight years of parenting, I am welcoming the independence that is headed our way.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not ready to move my oldest into the dorm yet, but I'm starting to see down the tracks a little bit, and not just what's immediately in front of us. And I'm embracing it.

Better yet, we are beginning to feel the payoff for all the hand holding, tear drying (for them and for me) and endless comforting from their fears. Not to mention the countless sticker charts and bribery techniques that I have employed, and am still doing to this day.

Now I can sense what it will be like when we aren't holding hands any longer, but I am comforted by the fact that we will still be holding hearts.

And it goes without saying that I'll keep holding hands for as long as they let me.