Five and a Day

Yesterday my son turned five years old. All day I kept trying to remember to write my 'ode' to him, but all day I got distracted with party planning. Both my work parties and his upcoming party. So while his birthday was very much on my mind yesterday, this blog was not.

Alas, the clock ticks by and now he's five. And a day.

I'm not sure what to make of it all really. It seems like just yesterday that he was a baby. But then again, I can hardly remember him being a baby at all. I have to conjur up images from photographs sometimes just to get the memories flowing.

The last five years have been a blur of growth spurts (when oh when will I stop needing to by new clothes and shoes every 3 months!?!), skinned knees, cups of chocolate milk, light sabers, torn up pants, baseballs, smiles, swords, worn down shoes, legos, laughs, more chocolate milk, some tantrums, more weapons of any kind, and of course some tears too.

Now I think I realize why I do so much clothes and shoe shopping for him. He's ruthless on his rags and the holes are endless.

Our son is such a whirl of constant activity that at times I wonder how he doesn't get dizzy. Or tired. At all.  He really just has "on" and "off". And when he's "on", there's no stopping him.  When he's "off" there's no waking him.

He has brought such a new dynamic to our family over the years. He has formed a special relationship with each of his sisters. Each one unique in it's own right. But still he's a little brother through and through. He fools us into thinking that he's much older than he is, since he keeps up with all kinds of conversations and happenings throughout our family.

But then he'll cry because he doesn't understand that his birthday party is actually two days later than his real birthday. And cry again after school because his friends didn't bring him presents, even though we've explained that the party is not for another two days.

And that's when we remember that he's only five, and he should be treated as such.

He still deserves to get all the cuddles he can stand (which is a lot, believe me), a kiss on every skinned knee, and a sweet lullaby every night. Even if the lullaby requested is Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer. Which it often is.

After all, he's just five years old. And as much as he seems older, and as much as he may try to keep up with his older sisters doing everything they do, but better, we need to remember that he deserves an energetic, carefree, creative and loving childhood.

So here's my birthday wishes to you, my last baby.

• May you always move in the direction you want and never let anything stop you.
• May you always get the well-deserved sweet rest that you need so that you can keep forging ahead in life.
• May you always appreciate the love and attention of your older sisters and know that you are special to all of us in the family, each in a unique way.
• May you always seem wise beyond your years.
• May we all never forget to let you simply enjoy your childhood, embracing every laugh, every tear and every new step.

I love you sweet little man.

She's Seven

Today is my middle child's birthday. She turned seven years old.

Lucky number seven. Lucky for so many reasons if you ask me.

I feel lucky to have such a wonderful person in my world. She is so full of life, so kind and loving. Over the past few years she has shown us all so much more of her personality. She's found her voice and her comfort zone and she's not going back.

Gone are the quiet and shy days of the past. In fact now most days she is not at all quiet. Rather loud I'd say. She can let out a wail with the best of them, just to make sure you are paying attention. I keep telling her she can't 'cry wolf' all the time or else I won't know when she's really hurt. So as if to prove a point, last week she had an incident that created our first accident-based doctor's visit, a near-miss with stitches. And did she cry? Not a bit. She just calmly walked up to her dad and said she got hurt. No wailing, no tears. But a lot of blood.

I guess I was wrong. There are some quiet moments in her life.

She also quiets down when she's being serious. Serious enough to tell me that she's sad about someone else being sad. That it hurt her 'on the inside' when she saw her friend get hurt.

And she's rather quiet when she's working away on an art project. Not one for video games, she'd rather do hands-on stuff. Her brother and sister could probably sit in front of a screen all day. But not her. She's got to get up and get out. Get working on a project or playing a game or sport.

I also think this year is lucky number seven because she's sort of catching up to her big sister for a little bit. For the next year or two they will share some really fun times. Right now they are loving being the girls in the family, and we have so much fun when it's 'girl time'. She adores her big sister, and tells her so. She absolutely radiates when her big sister is being sweet and nice and playing with her. She seems to know how important she is in this duo, even if her older sister isn't even aware of it yet.

So here are my birthday wishes for you this year, my little love.

• May you always have your voice, and may it always be heard, whether loud or soft.
• May you always stay calm and resist the panic, even in moments of fear or confusion.
• May you never lose your empathy for those around you.
• May you always get up and get out, taking full advantage of all that life has to offer.
• May you always realize how important and loved you are, even when it's not stated out loud.

Happy 7th birthday big girl.

Double Digits Baby

Today marks a full decade of life for my oldest daughter.

A decade. TEN years.

It doesn't sound like that old for an age. But in and of itself, it's a long time. A lot can happen in ten years. And a lot has, especially for her.

We have so enjoyed watching over her as she has found her way through those years. From making her first friend to having her first sleepover. From learning her ABCs to powering through the Harry Potter series. From hanging on to me at every good-bye to being ready to go to school before I'm even ready to leave the house.

Now she wants her own email address, calls to schedule time with friends, and makes herself her own snacks. Her growing independence is s source of great pride and sadness all at once. It means

new endeavors. New challenges. More successes, but inevitable failures. And in it all a whole lot of life lessons.

So far those lessons have taught her how to be a very caring and thoughtful girl. She helps out her younger siblings and even her friends. Her teacher has remarked that she is always someone to be counted on to help out in class and not complain if he pulls her away from something to lend a hand or to help make a situation more fair for all the kids involved.

And those ten years have also taught her to be embrace life's littlest moments. No matter where or when she can be heard singing a song, humming along in happiness. And what other people may call trash, she calls an opportunity for a new piece of art. Her creativity has clearly taken the lead in her life. Singing, music, art. Anything that lets her express herself in her own terms.

And now she is working on finding her own voice, and then listening to it. She has learned that she has the tendency to agree to things simply to make someone else happy, even if its something she doesn't want to do. She is learning that she has to be the one to find her own happiness and that it doesn't only come through making others happy.

To my oldest child. Here are my 10th birthday wishes for you.

• May you always be kind to others, taking the high road even when others try to lead you down the other path.
• May you always seize the day and always find something to sing about.
• May you always be able to give a voice to your inner needs and desires, learning that through your happiness you will also find a joy in making others happy.

Welcome to double digits, baby.

Marching On

I really need to get back into writing. I miss it so. The long list of things to do just keeps getting longer, and I really do think we all need to revisit those things that live at the bottom of our lists.

Those tend to be the things we should do the most. The more meaningful things that give us that shot in the arm that we need to start working our way down the list again, starting with the neediest items that we don't want to do but have to do. Those items that take up all our time so we never actually get to the bottom of the list.

Maybe I'll cut my long list into single items, put them in a bucket, and pick them out randomly. After I finish one I get to pick another. And then it's up to fate which ones get done every day.

I need to think about that some more. I think I might be on to something there.

I also need to think about my kids more. Which was the point of this blog when I started it.

It's time for a little catch up.

While things have changed around here, a lot has remained the same.

My oldest is still flittering about in the clouds most days, much like she has over the last several years. I admire her for it really. She has a beautiful mind that keeps growing and expanding and wrapping itself around life's most creative moments. In any given hour you will find her singing her way through her homework or the shower. Or through getting dressed or cleaning up. Or just about through anything these days. And she's now writing her own songs in a book. Perhaps you'll see it on MTV one day in the story of her musical life.

She's often found taking random items, which would otherwise be trash to me, and turning them into treasures. Boxes, bags, paper tubes, what have you. They become beds, homes or accessories for the little creatures in her life that are embodied by her stuffed animals. She's learning more about herself every day, and more about life too. She's really growing up into a beautiful young lady, inside and out.

And yet she still believes in Santa and the Easter Bunny. I hope that lasts a while longer, but I fear it won't.

Our younger daughter has changed the most over the past year or two. She's finally found her voice. She went from the quiet and shy girl that barely said "boo" to anyone, to the little spunky girl that now requests playdates and sleepovers and doesn't want to be picked up from after care.

Although the down side to this is the adjustment that we've all needed to make. She went from radio silence to a blaring bull horn that demands to be heard. Which, as you might imagine, can make for a rough transition for mom and dad. And teachers. I've always tried to "catch" my kids while being good. But I'm thinking maybe we didn't catch her often enough, being the one that was so quiet and sweet, and now she's going to make us catch her one way or the other.

It's not that bad. Just loud. And full of passion. She can be too quick to fly off the handle at all of us. But I think it's an expression of everything she's been holding in for so long. She never learned how to express herself in the right way. Now she's flooded with things to say and needs to learn how to process and sensor it all before it comes out. And that's a tough thing to learn. And to teach. But we're working on it.

In other areas she's still the same sweet girl she always has been. Loves to be outside. Chooses physical activity over screen time almost any day. Still so loving and caring to her little brother. And incredibly responsive to positive attention from her older sister. She craves that attention and we're working on getting more of it for her these days.

Now my youngest is probably the one that still rides the same waves. He's still a blur of activity and motion. Still can chatter away about the inane. Still loves to love. The spontaneous "I love you"s and hugs and kisses just melt me every time.

That boy's got my number. Quite frankly he's so damn adorable that he's got a lot of numbers these days. And I see a lot of that in his future too. Digits. Gonna get lots of digits.

It's fun to watch him learn and grow. He still loves to keep up with his big sisters. In fact he painted his own nails the other day.

And he just about refuses to go to sleep without his big sister in the room with him where she usually sleeps. Which will be more difficult to manage if we start getting her the sleepovers she's looking for these days.

As always, we are enjoying the laughs, we are annoyed by the annoyances, and we are relishing every loving moment we can get.

We continue to take deep breaths at the end of every day, because we know that no matter what time marches on. Sometimes with loud thunderous stomps, and sometimes with quiet little steps. But it's marching nonetheless.